Sidhu Paaji !!!!

Enclosing some of my Favourite Sidhuisms....Amazing :)

• Wickets are like wives - you never know which way they will turn!
• When you are dining with the demon you've got to have a long spoon!
• Only one man in a thousand is the leader of men, rest 999 follow the women.
• Blondes read OIL as 710
• Runs are flowing like the fare in Indian taxi.
• Beauty even when silent is eloquent.
• Sachin Tendulkar drives the ball faster than Michael Schumacher's Ferarri.
• Right now he's looking like a Cheshire cat that's had loads of cream!
• Its very difficult to kill a man who is hell bent upon committing harakiri!
• Statistics are like miniskirts, they reveal more than what they hide.
• The pitch is as dead as a dodo.
• Statistics are like bikinis? what they reveal is suggestive, what they hide is essential!
• All that comes from a cow is not milk!
• He has a backlift like an octopus falling out of a tree, all over the place!
• A hair on the head is worth two in the comb!
• There is always free cheese in a mousetrap
• Good intentions die unless utilized
• Money is like manure. It’s only useful when it’s spread
• There is light at the end of the tunnel for India, but it's that of an oncoming train which will run them over.
• You dont judge the Horse-power of a vehicle by the size of its exhaust.
• India look like a crippled cobra whose fangs are clipped.
• That ball went so high it could have got an air hostess down with it.
• Sehwag's score is running like an Indian taxi meter.
• The Only Thing You Get In Life Without Trying is dandruff.
• The Indians are going to beat the Kiwis! Let me tell you, my friend, that the Kiwi is the only bird in the whole world which does not have wings!
• The gap between bat and pad is so much that I would have driven a car through it!
• As uncomfortable as a bum on a porcupine.
• New Zealand team bats like a cycle stand!!! One falls and the entire team goes!
• The ball whizzes past like a bumble bee and the Indians are in the sea.
• As innocent as freshly laid eggs.
• All that comes from a cow is not milk.
• I lean on statistics like a drunken man leans on a lamppost, only for support, not illumination
• Every body has the thinking cap on, I have a 6 mts thinking turban on my head so i am bound to be the best.
• Sachin Tendulakar is using his bat to make the fielders run all over the place just like my wife uses her broom to make me run all over Punjab!
• Men die of their remedies, not illness
• Indian Middle Order collapses like a Cycle Stand - one goes and all go down!
• Only a brave mouse can build a nest in cat’s whiskers
• "Throw a lucky man in a deep sea and he will come out with fish in his mouth!"
• "Good intentions die unless utilized."
• "One, who doesn't throw the dice, can never expect to score a six"
• My parents always said, "laugh and everyone will laugh with you, sleep and you snore alone."
• Any good product without advertising is like winking at a girl in the dark, you know what your doing but she doesn't.
• Mandira Bedi: She is like a rampant river! She is very bubbly, she is original and a bright spark!
• All wives are worse than terrorists! They are very intimidating!
• You cant marry 450 times! To marry once is a folly, to marry twice is a blunder and to marry thrice is suicide!
• Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter!
• Mantra for the Indian team is… "Make hay while things are going haywire!"
• A girl born beautiful is half married
• Ganguly moves so slowly on the field like Jack of 'Jack n Jill' who goes to fetch pail of runs for the opposition
• A barking dog is better than a sleeping Lion, so go on Indians, Bark aloud! and let everyone hear you louder!!!
• The dog that barks last, barks best
• If you are trying to beat India in their home, you are you trying to get milk out of an ox.
• Indian team is just like Indian monsoon.you just cannot predict when there will be flood & when there will be drought.
• Rahul is like the hall of fire !!!!
• The ball slipped from his hands like butter from hot paratha
• Women are worse than wine - They intoxicate both the holder and the beholder (when a pretty young thing was shown on TV screen)
• Beauty even when silent is eloquent.
• Sachin Tendulkar drives the ball faster than Michael Schumacher's Ferarri.